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Wednesday, January 21, 2026

self care for ghosts

Welcome! This is my list of activities for a night of self care, a night to yourself, or any other circumstance where you need to relax and want to do it with an airy, spectral feeling. 

These are the nights you've used up all your social battery and grow weary of having this mortal flesh that requires constant upkeep and social presence. 

These activities can all be done alone, in complete silence, or maybe with some haunting instrumentals playing softly in the background. 


  •  Candles

I put this one first because it can be incorporated into basically any of the other activities! Candles are such an easy way to make your home feel cozier, older, and more haunted. 

Scented candles work well, especially if it's a light airy scent. 

I prefer candlesticks myself to watch the wax drip down slowly. Plus, candlestick holders are super easy to find at thrift and antique stores and are always beautiful!

Bonus points if you turn off all the other lights and sit exclusively by candlelight, or maybe hang some string lights from the ceiling if that isn't bright enough. These all cast a hazy glow around the room that is so relaxing.

  • Hot Baths

Seeing the steam rise from a hot bath can be super relaxing. The feeling of being in water at all tends to lend to that ghost feeling, kind of floaty and only partially existing. 

Showers don't work this way for me because there's something about being submerged in water while able to lean back and completely relax your body instead of having to stand in a small space. 

Although, at some point the water may turn cold. For some this may be a good end goal. Personally, I am averse to being cold and actually being warm and cozy helps give me the ghost feeling I prefer. Having to bundle up in layers makes me feel too bulky and crowded, and shivering only reminds me of the limitations of the flesh.

Hot baths can work especially well paired with candles. I recommend turning off the bathroom lights and only lighting a series of candles to set around the room. Bathroom fluorescence can be too exposing. 

Alternatively, you may try sitting in complete darkness. For safety purposes, please use some sort of light when moving around. Sitting in complete darkness submerged in warm water can give a wonderful feeling of being nothing but a soft shadow lurking in the corner.

  • Healthy Snacks

For the light feeling, I'd recommend any kind of fruit or vegetable with high water content. They tend to be softer and there's less of a need to chew. The lack of actions like this makes me feel more like a ghost. 

For an extra bonus, try fruits with a cream cheese dip that adds to it. Grapes are my favorite for this, but anything goes well with cream cheese! 

If that's not an option, adding whipped cream or topping to any fruits feels very spectral. 

My favorite recommendations would be watermelon, raspberries, grapes, or cantaloupe. I don't like blueberries myself, but I can imagine these would also be perfect!

  • Reading

This one is a classic. There's no simpler way to lose your physical body than to lose your head in a book! 

Whatever catches your attention is perfect, although fiction may work best.

For this, I'd recommend something easier and less complicated to avoid getting bored and having your mind wander. Maybe a small mass market paperback from a thrift store with a compelling mystery or thriller inside.

You may even be able to double up on books with ghosts. An easy ghost story that's relatively short and may be read in one sitting would be perfect for this! 

Remember, this isn't where we are searching for genius and literary masterpiece. We're searching for comfort. 

  • Journaling

There are an infinite number of things to journal about. The first one to come to mind may even be what you're reading about! A short reflection of your day, or any thoughts that come to mind will suffice. 

The act of putting pen to paper is very ethereal in itself, especially with a nice pen and journal or even with a more cryptic vibe using scrap paper, a random dull pencil, and messy handwriting. 

Journal entries could be about ghosts, from the point of view of a ghost, yourself, or fleshing out any haunting character stories. 

Light candles and make journal entries their own mini ritual, or part of a wider ritual. Creating repeated habits and familiar circumstances for yourself will always succeed in creating the feeling of a residual haunting.

Remember that journal entries can be whatever you make them! They can be long and detailed, creating an overarching narrative, they can be personal, artistic, or short, vague, and cryptic. 

  • Tarot

Tarot reading in itself gives me a ghostly feeling. There's something about the reflection and symbolism it takes to read tarot cards that feels otherworldly. 

Not to mention the feeling of communication it evokes, the idea that a separate consciousness is giving you answers, perhaps from the other side. 

The problem I run into when sitting down for a session of tarot reading is knowing what I'm looking for. Find any spreads you can online--I find most of mine on Pinterest. 

If there's nothing for you, a general spread is more than enough to get you started. This could be the focus of the day, week, month, or any upcoming events. Anything that has been lingering on your mind is open for discussion.

Another option is looking up journal prompts. Any of these prompts are good questions to ask your deck, and in turn can be used in journaling. 

I recommend always recording your thoughts during a tarot reading. This is another kind of journaling exercise that slows the reading down and forces you to think hard about what your answers are before moving on. 

For more similar ideas, read my list of activities and hobbies in How to be a Ghost.

That's all I have for now! I'm always open to comments or messages sharing your experiences with this topic or any others. Let me know what you think!


 

Sunday, January 18, 2026

case file: robert the doll

Robert the doll was created in 1904 and is considered the world's most haunted doll. Stories of Robert's haunting predate Annabelle, and even the first commonly known haunted doll: Talky Tina, featured in The Twilight Zone and based on the latest toy trend Chatty Cathy. Still, how haunted was Robert the Doll, and do the modern tales of curses and terrible fortune contain truth, or are they merely created of urban legends and superstition? With years of shoddy research and local tales, the facts surrounding Robert may not be at all the way we know them. What makes him tick, and is he really the monster we want to believe he is? Let's dive into some research.

Origin Story

In 1904, the Steiff company, located in Germany, manufactured a series of dolls dressed as jesters. They were large, the size of a young child. It may be the case that these dolls were not manufactured for children, but only meant as a display item for the shop window. Either way, this was an expensive doll.

Robert Eugene Otto was four years old, and many stories state that his German grandfather brought this doll home to Key West for him, and the boy affectionately dubbed him "Robert" (he himself was called Gene). Other stories claim that a Bahamian servant was unhappy with her job and cursed the doll with voodoo before gifting it to Gene. Alternatively, some say the young servant was very fond of Gene, and performed the voodoo to have the doll protect and care for Gene. 

This story is as old as Robert, coming up on one hundred and twenty-two years. After all that time, there must be countless details lost and changed as it passed down orally. 

Although these are the most popular theories about how Robert came into the Otto house, none of them appear to be true. For one, Gene's grandfather died in 1884, six years before Gene was born. And another, we know now that this was an expensive foreign item. A servant, especially an unhappy and poorly treated one, would simply have been unable to locate and purchase Robert for Gene.

It is unclear where the stories of servants and voodoo come from. However, Gene's grandfather became blind in his later years, requiring a personal servant. His name was William Abbott. Willam and his wife Emaline lived with the Ottos for years to come. They were abnormally close to the family and were even buried in their family plot, which was extremely unusual for people of color. 

According to David L. Sloan, Gene's father may have had an affair with Emaline. Emaline became pregnant with a child anywhere from 1900 to 1912, and I believe the theory is strong that when this child passed before its birth, it may have moved on to inhabit Robert. 

Still, there is no concrete evidence, or even really anything that suggests voodoo was involved. Frankly, I believe it was racist superstition that brought this theory to life, and I hope it dies as such. 

That being said, there is evidence that Gene's mother was the one who brought Robert home to Key West. This was confirmed in a passenger list from a boat traveling from Germany in 1904, which also lines up with the estimated date of Robert's creation. Gene's mother also happened to be Bahamian, which may have been the origin of stories about the Bahamian servant.

Gene's Childhood 

Gene was born with three older siblings, and even as a child kept very few friends. His siblings were often absent, all being older than him. This kind of loneliness in a child created a trust and maybe even dependence between him and Robert. 

There was certainly a resonance, as Gene gave Robert an old sailor outfit of his, which he wears still today. 

This relationship to a beloved toy is not uncommon in children. Gene's childhood is where the stories begin to be more unclear. 

It is widely believed that Gene's parents often heard him talking to Robert in his room alone, which is perfectly normal for a child at that age. However, they may have also heard Robert respond to him in his own, different voice. Some say this voice was the deep voice of a man, and others say it was merely a childlike giggle.  

It's commonly reported that Gene would shift blame to Robert after a wrongdoing, a story that birthed the phrase, "Robert did it!" in nearly ever article written about him.

Robert, like Gene, had a mean streak. The Ottos may have woken up many nights to Gene's screaming in terror, rushing to their youngest son only to find him in bed, surrounded by overturned furniture, held hostage by his only true friend. 

This habit of chaos became mutilated toys and other strange happenings. Each time, Gene would profess, "Robert did it!"

To me, these stories don't seem to line up. Perhaps I have a bias in favor of the charming little guy, or maybe I just have a critical eye. 

Either way, I just can't picture it. First, there are no official reports from Gene's parents, or even friends of theirs, that I was able to find. Each one regarding Robert simply said, "They are very close." 

Second, I cannot believe that Robert would have had it out for Gene as a child. They were close--some say out of the child's terror of him. This supposed terror led Gene to college and on to adulthood, away from Robert and free from his gravitational pull. When Gene and his wife returned to their childhood home, Gene was just as fond of Robert as ever. 

What boy, with some kind of childhood trauma of the doll, would become so successful and return with such a willingness and nostalgia to it?

Gene's Adulthood

Gene, an up and coming young man, left for college alone, leaving Robert behind at his parents' home. He became a successful artist, a stable man in society, and married Annette Parker, later Annette Otto. 

Annette was a talented pianist. She and Gene lived the first parts of their married life in New York, where Annette was incredibly successful. 

Then, Gene's mother became sick. His father had died previously. Annette and Gene moved back to Key West to live in his childhood home and take care of his mother until her passing. 

Annette was all too supportive and happy to give up her role as a successful young woman in the city and become an unknown housewife off the Florida coast. She played second fiddle to her husband's growing artist career, and maybe even to his rekindled relationship with Robert. 

When Gene returned home, he rescued Robert from the confinement of the attic and gave him the turret room, where Gene often painted. 

He built small scale furniture to suit him, and often locked them away together for the sake of Gene's art. They spend just as much time with one another as they ever had. This, perhaps, is when the stories began. 

What's normal for a child may not be so normal to rekindle as an adult. It's said that Robert even had his own space at the dining table. 

In fact, Robert's lion emerged during this time. The lion was not originally part of Robert's getup, and does not match his style, or the style of many other toys in that period. 

Its sitting position with two stumpy little legs, its wide open mouth, and big felt eyes match the style of toys made in the 1960s. There were typically two options for the mouth of a stuffed animal, depending on the design. Either it would have two "jaws" wide open similar to the pucker of a fish, or it would have no noticeable mouth except for a little red felt tongue. 

When Robert's keepers researched this, they determined the lion was made in 1964, I believe by a tag still attached to it. There are no reports of when or how the doll came to be in Robert's possession. However, 1964 was around ten years before Gene's death; he would have aged around sixty-four. 

To me it's a sweet thought, and definitely most likely, that Gene picked up the lion himself specifically for Robert. It's perfectly reasonable, given the amount of love for Robert and the care to include him in the family, that even at the age of sixty-four Gene would purchase a pet for his oldest friend. 

As the years went on, Gene and Robert became even closer. Much like when he was young, he had very few if any real friends. In the later days before his death, Robert kept him close company. What better way to make peace with dying than to be comforted by the oldest part of you; the part that will live on long after you are gone?

In 1974, Gene Otto died at the side of his life-long companion, Robert. Secondarily, his wife was also there.

Survived by Robert

In a mysterious sort of slight, Gene left everything to his older sister, Mizpah. They had been close throughout his adulthood. If I'm correct, Anne was left nothing but the house, after she had given up her entire career, all the excitement in her life, so that he could be happy. 

And, with her sunny disposition, she may never have mentioned it once. 

Anne moved to Boston after Gene's death to live with her sister. She sold the house with a "Robert Clause," stating that he remain in the attic and be the sole resident of it. 

The homeowners that came after Anne may be the reason Robert became so much more than a local legend. 

This family claimed to hear footsteps and giggling in the attic, as passersby would tell tales of seeing Robert watching them from the attic window. 

A plumber was once sent to the attic, where yes, they did have a toilet. As he worked, he heard giggling and, when he turned around, claimed Robert had moved across the room. The plumber left, job still unfinished, and never returned. 

This family also had a ten-year-old daughter in their time at the Artist House. The girl grew attached to Robert when they found him in the attic. Stories similar to those passed around about Gene's childhood emerged. Robert terrorized the girl, overturning furniture and mutilating toys. Locals say that even now, the woman claims Robert was trying to kill her. 

These stories spark the urge for discussion. Why would the doll terrorize this little girl? After being alone in the attic, one would think he would only want a child to love him again, and would accept the girl as his own. 

I may also point out that at this time in the mid-seventies, the country was seeing a rise of "demonology." Especially, as we know and love her, Annabelle the haunted doll. The Warrens were at their peak in traveling the country hunting down demons and ghosts, and America was terrified.

After all, scoring an exorcism would make them famous. With local legends already surrounding Robert, this family had just moved into a fortune. 

They kept Robert even after they sold the house. He moved with the family until he was sold to they Fort East Martello Museum in 1994 with claims of a severe haunting. If I had to guess, they earned a good deal of money from this sell. 

The Curse of Robert prevailed, and the seller died two months after his release. A tragedy, but perhaps not without reason, if it's true they had been exploiting Robert for profit. 

Robert in 2026 

Robert remains in Fort East Martello Museum in Key West, Florida, to this day. Visitors come in regularly to observe him, and often claim they can see him change the expression on his face. It is custom to ask Robert's permission before taking his photo and seek explicit permission (I don't know how this permission is deemed granted).

Those who are rude to him or take his photo without his permission may go on to have tragic accidents, horrible luck, or maybe even die. With this in mind, the museum is filled with letters of apology to Robert, pleading with him to lift the curse. 

It isn't all negative. People also send him fan letters and candy, and some letters even claim Robert had blessed them with good luck after their visit with him. He also has a personal caretaker, who is reported to have no opinion on the haunting--good luck or bad.

Robert's history is complicated and hard to trace. Countless blog posts exist, and hardly any of them give verifiable information or are well researched. This case can be more of an urban legend the way it has spiraled out of control overtime. 

But the facts are, Robert did have a life, and a boy, and he may be misunderstood. He is feared across the nation, for what? His timelessness? 

Whatever spirit or anything else that may inhabit his body, any sentience he may possess, he suffered a grief none of us can ever claim. He lost his boy, after a lifetime together, and was forced to face the fact that he may be eternal. 

He was passed around for years and given a reputation for being evil, only to be stuck in a glass box and ogled at for thirty years and counting. Give the guy a break. Send him some candy. 

Sources/Further Reading:

Robert's Official Website

Robert the Doll by David L. Sloan

"The Story Behind the World's Most Terrifying Haunted Doll"

"Robert the Doll"

"Discover the Story of Robert the Doll"

Other Posts in this Series:

The Montrose Ghost 

Wednesday, January 14, 2026

Haunting Your Own Memories

On revisiting the past without a trace

I am painfully sentimental. I see the good in everyone, even those who have hurt me badly. Even those where, perhaps, no good remains.   

I see the fuzzy haze of a memory and, even if it was bad, I long for it. The softness of the moment, the time that has passed. 

I know that with each passing moment I am older. My family is older, my friends a little farther away. I yearn to keep anyone close to me forever, even those I need to let go. 

Watching time pass is painful and lonely. Especially in the darkness of the Winter, when everything is silent and solemn. 

I have a habit in these dark winter months to begin haunting my own memories. I seek relentlessly some comfort from the passage of time, some proof that both the good and the bad times truly happened the way I remember. 

As memories become more distant, I can feel them slipping like sand through my fingertips. I become frenzied in trying to hold what little I can. 

This habit leads me to places no one should be. It leads me back into my past, alone, with any attempt to rekindle what once was mine. I start to think of these people, the ones who were cruel to me, and remember what they used to be. 

Then, I wonder if any part of them remains. I pester myself until I find out. It never goes well. It is impossible to bring these former loved ones back from the dead. My monkey's paw, I call it, each time I rekindle a relationship and find it just as rotten as it was before. The putrid smell fills my lungs and it poisons, leaving a dark stain on a memory that was once sweet.  

You cannot bring them back from the dead. The truth is, nothing is the same. Nothing will ever be the same again. 

And, if somehow you find yourself able to bring them back, able to live with the rot, you still may find that the version of them you craved no longer exists, and maybe it never did. 

Do not drag its rotting corpse with you; it is too heavy to sustain. 

When I was young and hurt, I used to throw out everything related to the pain. I used to remove it entirely as if removing the proof would target the source. This is never the case. 

Of course there are things you should let go of permanently. But my advice is to merely stash it away; lock it up in a closet and forget about it for years to come, until you feel the memories again like a cavity. These souvenirs are haunted objects. You may haunt them, but do not haunt the living. 

It isn't fair, of course not. These jagged endings, they were never supposed to happen like this. They were supposed to be free and easy, natural and peaceful; not filled with blood and tears. 

The sudden loss of innocence was never supposed to happen like that. But it did, and if you were given a do-over, it would again. There is no changing the past, because everyone else has moved on. If you find yourself in the past, you must understand that you are there alone. 

What's dead is dead. There is no reviving it, so we must learn to let it stay in the grave. Perhaps, after years of practice and years of forgetting, one day we will also be able to rest easily.  

Sunday, January 11, 2026

playlist for ghosts

a haunting is a personal thing

this is my collection of songs for ghosts, about ghosts, and/or with a general ghastly vibe. here’s a link to the playlist on my spotify, and below are some of the songs listed!

  • “Harvest Moon” - Neil Young
  • “Girl with no Eyes” - It’s a Beautiful Day

  • “Antique Doll” - The Electric Prunes

  • “Turn Around, Look at Me” - The Vogues

  • “My Little Town” - Simon & Garfunkel

  • “Ordinary World” - Duran Duran

  • “A Lot’s Gonna Change” - Weyes Blood

  • “Halah” - Mazzy Star

  • “Can’t Go Back” - The Crane Wives
  • “You’ll Love Me When I’m Dead” - Unwoman

  • “How It Ends” - Unwoman

  • “Conversations With Ghosts” - Bear’s Den
  • “Train Song” - Vashti Bunyan

  • “Goodbye Forever Once Again” - Jason Webley

  • “Can I Call You” - Marlon Williams
  • “Blues For A Young Girl Gone” - Strawberry Alarm Clock

  • “Eleanor Rigby” - The Beatles

  • “Is This What You Wanted” - Leonard Cohen
  • “Apple Tree” - Marika Hackman

  • “Rose Petals” - S. Carey
  • “Only You” - Matthew Perryman Jones

  • “The Only Living Boy in New York” - Simon & Garfunkel

  • “Bookends Theme” - Simon & Garfunkel

  • “Old Friends” - Simon & Garfunkel

  • “Scarborough Fair”- Simon & Garfunkel

  • “A Most Peculiar Man” - Simon & Garfunkel

  • “Last Night I Had the Strangest Dream” - Simon & Garfunkel

  • “Bleecker Street” - Simon & Garfunkel

  • “The Sun is Burning” - Simon & Garfunkel

  • “Chains” - Duran Duran

  • “Nowhere Man” - The Beatles

  • “Look What You’ve Done” - Bread

  • “Waters of March” - Art Garfunkel

  • “Down in the Willow Garden” - Art Garfunkel

  • “Night Game” - Paul Simon

  • “The Side of a Hill” - Paul Simon

  • “The Afterlife” - Paul Simon

  • “A Thousand Stars” - Kathy Young & The Innocents

  • “I’m So Tired” - The Beatles

  • “Look at Me” - Bread

  • “Please Mr. Gravedigger” - David Bowie

  • “Ghosts” - Stevie Nicks

  • “Bright Eyes” - Art Garfunkel

  • “The Other Side of Life” - Bread

  • “You Feel So Lonely You Could Die” - David Bowie

  • “Shadows On Your Side” - Duran Duran

  • “Disappear” - Jason Webley

  • “Almost Time to Go” - Jason Webley

  • “Andromeda” - Weyes Blood

  • “Willow Tree March” - The Paper Kites

  • “Back to Autumn” - Tall Heights

  • “Local Honey” - AL Riggs

  • “Ghost of a Lie” - The Accidentals

  • “Fade Into You” - Mazzy Star

  • “Space Song” - Beach House

  • “Ghost Town” - First Aid Kit

  • “The Ghost on the Shore” - Lord Huron

  • “The Yawning Grave” - Lord Huron

  • “Haunted” - The Moody Blues

  • “Ghost” - Bananarama

  • “Dead Man’s Party” - Oingo Boingo

  • “The Sound of Silence (Acoustic)” - Simon & Garfunkel

Wednesday, January 7, 2026

Essentials of Ghost Hunting: Safety & Ethics

Welcome to Essentials of Ghost Hunting! In this series, I'm presenting a full guide with everything you need to know to go on your ghost hunt. Even if you're relatively seasoned, there still may be one or two things in this series that stick out. 

This series will contain:

  • This post! Intro to Ghost Hunting--Safety and Ethics
  • What's in Your Bag? 
  • Documentation Methods & Practices
  • Eyewitness Interviews
  • Independent Investigation
  • Conducting Your Investigation
  • Organizing and Examining Notes
  • Following Leads
  • Concluding the Investigation

This series will update periodically, after posts "for the ghosts" and "for the haunted."

I would love to begin with the ethics of ghost hunting. First, consider the connotations of the phrase, "ghost hunting." The implication is death, or in this case, ceasing to exist. Although it is sometimes framed as helping the deceased move on, this is not what the name suggests. 

However, what are its alternatives? Paranormal investigation, while it may be too wordy to fit in a good post title, is overall a better choice of words. Personally, I tend to prefer paranormal researcher, as an investigation rarely if ever comes to a concrete end.

 These phrases sound more professional, more scientific, and much less reckless than the thought of a ghost hunt. In this situation, the ghosts are not objects of prey, they are objects of curiosity. It is important to acknowledge a ghost, whether intelligent or residual, as something that was once alive. Empathy is crucial in this field. 

Respect for both the living and the dead is necessary long before getting started. There is a particular etiquette that comes with entering someone else's home, living or dead. First, consider the current property owners. Their permission to investigate on the property is required to proceed, unless you have a particular want for jail time. 

Then, once research on the area is complete, you must figure out how to go about the investigation in a respectful manner to the spirits. For example, are the circumstances of the death known? If so, how recent was it? 

If this ghost may have living relatives, they may not appreciate your prying. It must be difficult to think of a loved one in that way, especially if the cause of death was particularly traumatic. 

Either way, it could easily be insulting to suggest that a loved one's spirit is not at rest or has since become a ghost, something to toy with, and kind of circus freak. 

Always approach any possible ghosts with respect, understanding and empathy. Once, they were just like you. and one day, you will be just like them.

This post is pretty short, basically just a precursor for everything else. I'll be back soon with another post!

 
Other posts in this series:
What's in Your Bag?
Documentation Methods & Practices
Eyewitness Interviews
Independent Investigation
Conducting Your Investigation
Organizing and Examining Notes
Following Leads
Concluding the Investigation